


Please Don't Get a Sugar Rush!

by Agraulis_vanillae



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Underswap, Buff Lizard, Christmas, Christmas Fluff, Domestic Fluff, F/F, First Meetings, Fluff, Gen, Implies a Female Reader though?, Nerd Fish, No gender specified, Polyamorous Character, Reader-Insert, Slice of Life, Underswap Alphys - Freeform, Underswap Undyne - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-24
Updated: 2016-12-24
Packaged: 2018-09-11 19:57:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,776
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9009136
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Agraulis_vanillae/pseuds/Agraulis_vanillae
Summary: You get much more than anticipated when shopping at your local bookstore.Also, Alphys doesn't know how to wrap presents.





	

You were shopping for presents during the early days of the holidays, trying to comb through bookshelves for books that would match your friends' tastes. It was easy enough to shop for one person, who didn't really want books at all, but card expansion packs for their strategy game. However, another friend gave you strangely specific instructions that somehow didn't make shopping for them any easier. Another friend was really into a book series, meaning that all you had to do was pick up the next novel, and maybe some candy to keep the gift from being so predictable as to be boring. You were musing on the merits of making fudge, and whether you had time to go to the grocery store and make it after work, when you noticed the monster sitting at the volunteer gift wrapping table was looking extremely uncomfortable.

 

She was tightly bundled up with a warm hand-knit scarf, gloves, and a heavy down jacket even inside the store. Her face was somewhat triangular like a lizard, with sunny yellow scales and one of her eyes were scarred closed like she'd been in a fight. You briefly wondered what happened, and then your thoughts shifted to wondering if she needed to thermoregulate, and then how she was sweating so much-

 

“Oh.” You accidentally made eye contact with her. You rapidly searched for something polite to say and blanked out, not expecting any confrontation from your casual observation. “Um, are you wrapping presents?”

 

Clearly, only the most intelligent conversation from you.

 

“Y-yeah! OF COURSE!” She seemed to be as unprepared for this social encounter as you are, and is sweating even more profusely. “...would you like me to wrap something?!”

 

“Ummm...”

 

You were starting to think sarcastically to yourself that you might be a poet with the way you've been responding, but to be fair you still could only think about how a lizard monster sweated before she got annoyed and yelled, slamming both hands on the table:

 

“O-OR ARE YOU GONNA STARE ALL DAY LIKE A DWEEB?!!”

 

You took an involuntary step back at the force that she barked at you, and slapped a hand on the beanie that threatened slip off your head only for the plastic case with the cards to slide off the pile and fall on the floor, promptly followed by all but one book. “Wha! N-no get back here!!”

 

You crouched to grab your merchandise quickly, only to be beaten to the expansion card pack by the monster who picked them up from underneath the table, straightening up after bending down. “Do you need help? Oh... these cards...”

 

“A friend of mine really likes the game,” You explained, sheepishly. “I don't know much about the game at all, but the characters on the cover of this card pack look really se- pretty, I mean.”

 

It was probably best you didn't mention that you were totally gay for the character and make this any more awkward than it has to be.

 

“My girlfriend started collecting these when we got to the surface. I don't really get it, but if I had to guess she'd really like the swords-woman on the cover.” The buff monster put the card pack so it balanced on your books again. “She's really into anime with those things on it, and got me hooked too. She's actually around here somewhere, probably going through the manga.”

 

Or, maybe it wouldn't be so awkward to mention that the character on the card pack had great tits. You still needed to get your shopping done though, so you decided that you could come back to talk some more. “Hey, listen, I gotta find this other thing my other friend gave me this really vague suggestion and so I need to banish myself to the sci-fi section until I find something 'not Star Wars, not Star Trek, not Dune, and not Michael Crichton'? Whatever that means? But, I will come back to get my presents wrapped, it might save me some time trying to figure out how to wrap this plastic case. I hope you don't mind?”

 

You nodded to the pack of cards, as the monster paled, and began sweating again at full force but she said forcefully “Y-yeah! NO PROBLEM! I'll wrap the shit out of those cards!!!”

 

You turned back to do your shopping, a bemused expression on your face and no questions having been answered. You left wondering if lizard monsters had sweat glands, and then your mind wandering down the rabbit hole of magic versus biology. In comparison, the sci fi section seemed almost banal once you stepped into the aisle. You managed to dig out a book nonetheless, and after checking the reviews on your phone, deemed it an acceptable gift and turned back to purchase the items. That was about when you heard the commotion and a sudden roar. You turned to face the gift wrapping table, just to see said table flying your direction.

 

“ _DODGE!”_ Someone behind you yelled.

 

Defying your wiser impulses, you remained rooted in place in sudden disbelieving shock as the table engulfed your vision.

 

…

 

 

…..?

 

You don't quite remember what happened, but your head was being supported in someone's lap as you'd entered back into the world of consciousness. You found yourself staring into the intelligent topaz eyes of a worried monster with shimmering blue scales and red hair with tufts straying into her face.

 

The words came out of your mouth even before you were quite aware of what you were saying, “Heaven's missing an angel...”

 

Those eyes widened, and she blushed intensely, “I-I t-think she's c-c-concussed...”

 

“FWAHAHA She's FINE! I think you're an angel too babe!” At the loud boom of laughter, you sat up quickly only to keel over right away from the head rush and ensuing head pain. The yellow lizard monster went to grab you but “HEY you're not allowed to move when you're injured!”

 

“What happened?” You murmured, reaching up to try and seek out the source of your headache, but only having your hand clasped by buttery soft hands and held away from the injury.

 

“H-here, try eating t-this... it'll make you feel b-better.” Something round and hard like a marble was placed to your mouth, and cautiously obeying, you slowly allowed it to be pushed it past your lips. A distinctly non-licorice flavor permeated your senses, and slowly you felt your focus sharpen enough to be understand what must've happened. Meanwhile, the pretty red haired monster continued babbling nervously. “It's m-my fault, I shouldn't have p-pushed Alphys to do something outside her comfort zone, and now someone's gotten hurt for it and-”

 

“Shhh, Undyne, you didn't MAKE me do anything! I figured even if I didn't know how to wrap presents, I could do it with enough PASSION, but then that last guy that came around was a total jerk and I lost my cool...” Alphys explained gruffly, soothing the other monster brushing her knuckles gently across her forearm. “Because of that, I accidentally hurt someone nice... I need to train myself to keep my cool so this doesn't happen again. GYAHHH! THAT DOESN'T EXCUSE WHAT I'VE DONE THOUGH!! Let me make it up to you?!”

 

You were still trying to wrap your mind around the fact that you accidentally got a table chucked at you. You struggled to sit up again, this time more determined to seek out the damage, but despite the drying sticky blood from your face up to your hairline, you couldn't actually find an injury. Everything kinda itched though. You asked hesitantly, “Make it up to me..?”

 

“W-well... maybe we could work on making sure t-they're okay. How are you feeling?” the fish lady called Undyne stood up and holding your hands, helped you to your feet too. You didn't feel particularly hurt or dazed, so you shrugged.

 

“As good as one can be, I think.”

 

“That's good, because I think we're about to get kicked out,” Alphys mumbled, shuffling a bit and rubbing her cheek close to the scarred eye, as store employees and a manager approached cautiously. “I'll see you outside babe and I hope you're not mad... uh... WAIT I HAVEN'T EVEN INTRODUCED MYSELF?!!”

 

“Alphys...” Undyne sighed, a combination of exasperation and fondness in one. You told them your name, reaching to shake Alphys's hand.

 

“Excuse me, but we must insist you both be escorted out of the store.” One employee said firmly, and you looked between the two girls with concern. “If not, we will call the police for assaulting one of our customers.”

 

“Wait, hold up, it was an accident- and why are you escorting her?” You pointed to Undyne, who was still holding one of your hands. You could feel her grip tightening, muscles trembling with tension, and your protective streak rising in response. It didn't seem quite right that they were both getting kicked out especially when the employees had apparently disappeared once you'd gotten knocked out and you defensively declared, “She helped me, I'm not even hurt or anything.”

 

“I'm sorry ma'am, but they're too dangerous to have in here.” the manager stepped in, holding firm. “You have blood running down your face, and we need to file an injury report.”

 

You realized that you still looked a mess despite the injury having been healed at a supernatural rate from whatever Undyne gave you. You couldn't see it, but you could feel blood plastered across your face and clotting up in your hair. Frankly, you felt pretty gross at this point.

 

“Hey, I know I messed up, but don't blame my girlfriend for my mistakes!” Alphys growled. You heard a whistling breath from next to you and looked over in puzzlement, only to realize straight off that Undyne was having a panic attack.

 

“Hey, it's okay they aren't going to kick you out, you didn't do anything wrong.” You told her quickly, moving into her line of sight of the employees. “Breathe slowly. Copy me.”

 

“Undyne!” Alphys was by your sides in a heartbeat, but you remained focused on the task. You were aware of the situation threatening to escalate, and made a split decision. “Are you having an attack?!”

 

“C'mere, let's move here where you might feel safer, and keep following my breathing pattern.” You led Undyne away from the confrontation and to a corner of the store, but not out of the store just yet. You remained there, feeling Undyne's grip on your hand slacken. “Are you better?”

 

She nodded, and then you were startled as you both were picked up handily, thrown over Alphys's shoulders, and swooped out of the store with Alphys's manic laughter. “FWAHAHAHAHA!!”

 

“Uh, wait what about my stuff?!” You shouted.

 

“I've got it right here!!!” She shouted as she ran out with you both, with Undyne starting to giggle breathlessly, not totally recovered from hyperventilating.

 

“W-wait, shouldn't I stick around for that injury report?” You stuttered, totally not expecting this new development. You were getting the impression that maybe you should get used to this feeling for the time being, but your were too busy still being surprised.

 

“THAT'S THE BEST PART, THEY CAN'T FILE THE REPORT WITHOUT YOU HERE!!!”

 

“Isn't that technically -uh- some sort of crime?!” You struggled a little bit only to be put down on jelly legs outside a store much further away. Sheesh, she runs fast. Undyne looked like she was about to swoon, but was held steady by your hand and Alphys's hand. You were starting to realize that neither of you really let go of the others hand since you woke up and tried to remove yourself. “Oh, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to invade your space like this.”

 

The words rolled off your tongue strangely, a part of you reflecting that wasn't quite what you meant but you weren't sure how to apologize for holding the hand of another girl's girl.

 

“What!!!” Alphys looked annoyed. “Listen dweeb, there's nothing to apologize for! You have every right to be mad with me right now!! So, be mad?!!! Or do something that's not apologizing!!!”

 

“...” You stayed silent for a moment, thinking about it. No, you really weren't angry, though you were getting tired from such a crazy series of events. “... No.”

 

“Y-you're not m-mad?” Undyne finally stuttered. You shook your head once more. She fiddled with her hands, both of them free now.

 

“How about you do something that's not apologizing?” Alphys bargained. “Maybe letting us make it up to you?”

 

“D-do you...” Undyne blushed, and before you knew it she was hiding her face in Alphys's shoulder shyly. You were starting to get that she was naturally socially awkward, but in a charming way. “I-I mean, if you d-don't mind... h-h-how about we g-get some c-coffee or, or, or! Hot coco, if you d-don't mind?! N-n-n-not like it's a d-date or anything! Not that it c-can't NOT be a d-date- ughhh..!”

 

You stared at them with your mind short-circuiting as bad as the furiously blushing monster in front of you, while Alphys suddenly averted her eyes with a secretive smile and scales growing warm even in the winter weather. “Aren't you two... together? I thought from what Alphys said earlier..?”

 

“We are!!! And we totally love each other! But... oh man, how to explain this...” Alphys rushed to explain, stepping forward earnestly. “We don't mind going on dates with other people either. Together, I mean! Sheesh, this is tougher to explain to a human that I thought. ANYWAYS! So, if it makes up for what happened inside the store, we'd be happy to go on a date with you.”

 

You averted your eyes and backed away. You weren't comfortable with scoring a date by making them feel obligated. “No, that's okay. I know I probably look like a wreck but you guys fixed me up and everything so don't feel like you have to! If you have something better to do, I don't mind! I'm probably just going to take care of the rest of my holiday shopping.”

 

“Then, m-maybe we can c-come with and help you c-c-carry some of these bags? B-but only if th-that doesn't make you u-uncomfortable or anything!!”

 

You squirmed in place, still worried about imposing. You murmured, not quite meeting anyone's eyes as you silently criticized yourself for letting yourself be needy enough that you wanted this couple's company even knowing that they were together. “Well... just promise me it's because you want to and not because you feel bad?”

 

“Who the hell goes around doing a dweeby thing like that?!! Listen punk! If we're gonna hang out, it's best we get this one thing straight- we don't go out of our way to do this for just ANY random stranger that accidentally gets hurt!” Alphys crossed her arms and glared at you. “A few minutes ago, you helped Undyne out of a panic attack like it was nothing! I'm willing to bet MONEY that you're worth getting to know.”

 

“I mean, it was only the right thing to do...” you mumbled abashedly.

 

Undyne looked to you with a shy smile. “I t-think Alphys's p-point is p-proven.”

 

“Okay then...” you murmured quietly, a faint flush rising to your cheeks. Alphys pulled a handkerchief from her pocket and dabbed it on her tongue. “I'd like that.”

 

“Hold still?” She held your chin gently and began wiping blood off your face, as you flushed harder. “That was starting to look pretty itchy and uncomfortable. I should know, I get beat up all the time in training!”

 

“Thanks. What do you train for?” You asked, heading into a shop escorted by your new... friends?

 

~

 

The day ended in a coffee shop after all when Alphys started slowing down and needing to warm up. This was when you got their phone numbers and was promptly invited to their New Year's celebration. It took almost two full weeks of both of them flirting through text before you came to the stunning realization on New Year's Eve that they BOTH liked you. You would've blamed concussion by table, but being kissed on both cheeks short-circuited you so that by the time the New Year rolled around, you were too preoccupied with screaming into a pillow to notice.

 

Once you realized it was time to make your New Year's wish, you couldn't think of anything better than “I hope they don't get a sugar rush eating all of the candy I made.”

 

It sounds stupid, but even half asleep and sandwiched between the two, covered in blanket after blanket, you felt there wasn't a better wish to start out the year with.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks goes to SmallPersianKitten for inviting me to write for the Holiday collection, and thanks to Zaiyofics for making it! I decided on the theme of "Alphyne Fluff" to begin with and ended up wanting to put out a story about some of the rarer Alphyne AUs- in other words, almost any of them that aren't Undertale Classics! So I decided on Swap after thinking about an incident I had a couple of years ago when my mom volunteered me to wrap presents for volunteer experience- but without actually showing me how to wrap presents! Very awkward! Instead of having Undyne sit there and sweat it out awkwardly like I did, I wanted Alphys to do it and go on a Godzilla rampage. X3 It makes for a great anime-esque 1st meeting, doesn't it?  
> Anyways, Happy Holidays everyone! I'll be updating LOTS of different stories in the next couple of weeks, so if you follow/subscribe to me, keep an eye out! If you don't, feel free to follow me on Tumblr or even just drop in a message! LoL everyone; Lots of Love! And take care of yourself during the holiday madness!  
> https://agraulisvanillae.tumblr.com/


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